In what could be an oscar winning performance *cue the laughter*, Britney Spears is set to star in a new “sadomasochistic sex movie” called The Knoxville Carjacking Party. The failing pop star’s last movie, Crossroads, was savaged by critics

“The movie, based on the true story of two students who were allegedly carjacked, kidnapped, raped and killed in the Tennessee city, would no doubt pose a number of challenges for the young star.”

Concern has been raised over whether Spears would be able to handle the intensity of the disturbing sex scenes. Hmmm shouldn’t they be more concerned over her acting ability or lack of. Shitney should just stick to making stripper videos for comedic purposes and not for forcing her craptastic songs on us. There’s nothing better than watching Shitney parade her cottage-cheese-in-a-garbage-bag-thighs around a stripper’s pole, desperately trying to revive an already buried career. Speaking of which, rumor has it that she’s going to team up with Justin Timberlake for her next album. And just when I thought he couldn’t do any worse than Hagdonna. This is career suicide!